Just back from the doc's office. She's a tiny woman with a big heart and a great mind. She says my grief and depression are on target and doesn't recommend either pills or therapy, unless I really want that --
support from friends, which I have,
is what heals, she says,
that and getting up each day and doing what's in front of me to do.
Well, that's pretty much what I thought, but it was good to talk with her, and cry, and have authoritative confirmation that I'm fucked up and that that's in the nature of things, given the givens. She asked me if I'd forgiven myself (ok, she really gets it). We talked about the responsibility we all have for how things are going in our culture, country, planet, about how everything and everyone is connected, about how one boy's suicide affects us all.
She also gave me prescriptions for refills and wrote a lab order and other typical doctor stuff.
Typical, normal. Those are oddly comforting words.
I think I'm going to bead her a necklace. She's been a great ally for over seven years now. It's funny how we don't typically go out of our way to thank doctors, except in passing at the end of our exams, or whatever. In the past I've thought
but they get paid for what they do. Well, yeah, but so do I. Who doesn't appreciate a special thank-you now and again?
I haven't done weather magic (I trust the universe, generally speaking, to know what's best weather-wise) -- but I do hope the skies will clear so I can eclipse-gaze tonight. I remember so fondly sitting under the last lunar eclipse with Lilith and my beloved. We were mesmerized. I have noticed that this morning's drizzle and heavy fog have lifted, that the overcast of late morning is still present, but thinning. There's a suggestion of sun through there, just beyond the gray veil. I hope, I hope, I hope...
I also ran across this at Mooncircle, by following one of
Laura Salmonstone's links:
Astrologically this darkening does not mean a loss or negation of what the Moon represents, but
an intensification and an opportunity to see through to its essence. Just as the stars become visible only when the Sun’s light is absent, the Moon can reveal certain secrets when her face is veiled. (
Full Moon)
Haloscan:
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Blogger:
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